My earliest sense of creativity came to me when I was about 5 years old. I came home from a particularly boring day at the zoo spent with the family of a friend of mine and my mom asked me, "how was your day?" My day was very much uneventful and shitty (because my friend was a jerk) but I decided that instead of explaining the truth to my mother, I'd fabricate and deliver an exciting little lie. I told her that I climbed into the elephant's cage and convinced one of them to chase me. I explained that when I found myself being chased that I fell into the elephant's giant water dish before miraculously escaping by climbing back over the chain link fence that surrounded the pen. Of course, this was ridiculous and my mom called my friend's mom in order to confirm the story. She explained to me later that day that she knew I had lied and that it wasn't a good thing but that it was okay because I was expressing my creativity.
Ever since then I've been putting my creative energy to work on whatever held my interest at the time. I've gone through both constructive and destructive phases, dabbled (very lightly) in dozens of different art mediums, but didn't find my real artistic passion (writing) until I was about 13 years old. Since it was the beginning of my adolescence, my writing exploration began in pursuit of creating basic erotic texts. I don't know if I'd consider my path a perverse one, but, I'm proud to admit it definitely was an abnormal one. Driving to satisfy myself sexually caused me to become a better writer inadvertently.
I'm a very shy and somewhat anti-social person. I have some emotional issues (interpreting and coping with emotions, for example) that sprout from my early childhood. My parents are the exact opposites of one another and because of that, my thought process is often split down the middle. Ever since I learned to make people laugh at a very young age, comedy has been a great escape for me because making other people happy, in turn, makes me happy. God, what a tear-jerking moment! 
Chapter One - Birth of the Creature
Our scene opens upon a hot, misty fall morning, deep inside the jungles of Brazil. We see a large, deep-green, thick-leaved bush being rocked violently about. A high-pitched squeal emanates from deep within the bush and pierces the canopy of trees above. A one-of-a-kind mammal, unknown to modern science, is giving birth to what will soon come to be known to the locals as "The Zorn"; hours pass and finally the triumphant roar of the creature's father erupts, sending all other animals scattering for cover among the shrubbery and overgrowth of the secluded jungle. The Zorn has been given life. His seven eyes open to a greenish blur as they adjust to the territory that is now his hunting grounds.
Chapter Two - First Sight
Months later, Brazilian newspapers all across the country sport low-quality tabloid style photos of a large six-legged beast with gaping fangs and deadly claws tearing at the fresh meat of a bloody, lifeless Jaguar. The beast is referred to in reports only as "The Zorn". Witness accounts claim the beast fled into hiding as soon as it was spotted.
Chapter Three - The Hunter
The Zorn moved carefully about, creeping slowly towards the wetlands of the jungle where he would prey upon the unsuspecting Jaguars and Ocelots. He was a master of manipulation and prided himself on his cunning wit. Someday, The Zorn thought, he would grow up to become a famous writer. Perhaps for screenplays or novels or maybe a porn film. But right now, he was thirsty for blood. He set his creative efforts aside and focused on the kill.
Chapter Four - City Life
After years spent living peacefully in the jungles of Brazil, The Zorn was captured by local poachers and sold on the black markets of Northern America. He began to question his religious beliefs and soon found himself turning to other outcasts for understanding. The Zorn found a high school where he was accepted for what he was and soon after made many friends. These friends later became his close associates in the film industry where he cultivated many concepts and storylines and gave life to short comedy films.
Chapter Five - Life on the Stage
Soon after joining up with Naked Castle Films, The Zorn knew he would never get to appear on screen with his frightening six-legged figure. He underwent extensive reconstructive surgery and emerged with a voice box, two legs, two arms, two eyes, and a human face. Unfortunately, his luck with the opposite sex was still hindered by his lack of a human penis. He hopes to someday have the money to afford one.
Last Updated 2.15.04
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